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as_sporkiveOriginally posted by Rorschach (scavokretlaw) on November 17, 2012
I have a problem with this (and the next chapter’s) titles. It’s a book. The chapter length can and does vary. You don’t need to have two sections of a chapter, it’s not clever. Have one chapter.
“But what if it would make an obscenely long chapter?” you ask? Have an obscenely long chapter.
Also this chapter is four pages long.
We begin with Eragon noticing different things at the same time. It’s a big chamber about two hundred feet across with a pit in the middle, it’s very hot, the walls sparkle like Edward Cullen’s chest, and there’s a man made of metal with a dragon head.
The Tin Man walks towards them, bellows, and then starts mindraping the shit out of all of them.
A blur of light and a roar of incoherent noise surrounded him as the yammering chorus forced itself into every nook and cranny of his being (page 554).
The Tin Man examines all of Eragon’s memories, including probably the really embarrassing ones where he masturbates while scrying Arya, and eventually releases him. He then welcomes Eragon and Saphira with the standard “had to be sure your intentions were pure, nice to meet you, etc.”
Eragon looks around and suddenly realizes the sparkling walls aren’t vampire abs, they’re actually dozens and dozens of glowing orbs. Eldunari. He then looks down at a different section and is gobsmacked. His knees grow week, his breath is taken away, he doesn’t know what to say.
Because there are eggs there.
Dragon eggs.
“I am so surprised by this revelation that there are more dragon eggs out there!” said no one ever.
The chapter ends on this CLIFFHANGER. Except it’s not a cliffhanger, at all. I’m not even sure why Eragon is so surprised. Sure, he’s not the least bit Genre Savvy, but still, the one place in Umlautgaesia where there could possibly theoretically be dragon eggs…has dragon eggs. Why is this so surprising?
“But what if it would make an obscenely long chapter?” you ask? Have an obscenely long chapter.
Also this chapter is four pages long.
Technically, it’s three and a quarter pages long.
We begin with Eragon noticing different things at the same time. It’s a big chamber about two hundred feet across with a pit in the middle, it’s very hot, the walls sparkle like Edward Cullen’s chest, and there’s a man made of metal with a dragon head.
The Tin Man walks towards them, bellows, and then starts mindraping the shit out of all of them.
A blur of light and a roar of incoherent noise surrounded him as the yammering chorus forced itself into every nook and cranny of his being (page 554).
The Tin Man examines all of Eragon’s memories, including probably the really embarrassing ones where he masturbates while scrying Arya, and eventually releases him. He then welcomes Eragon and Saphira with the standard “had to be sure your intentions were pure, nice to meet you, etc.”
Eragon looks around and suddenly realizes the sparkling walls aren’t vampire abs, they’re actually dozens and dozens of glowing orbs. Eldunari. He then looks down at a different section and is gobsmacked. His knees grow week, his breath is taken away, he doesn’t know what to say.
Because there are eggs there.
Dragon eggs.
“I am so surprised by this revelation that there are more dragon eggs out there!” said no one ever.
The chapter ends on this CLIFFHANGER. Except it’s not a cliffhanger, at all. I’m not even sure why Eragon is so surprised. Sure, he’s not the least bit Genre Savvy, but still, the one place in Umlautgaesia where there could possibly theoretically be dragon eggs…has dragon eggs. Why is this so surprising?
It seems eight pages is simply far too long to serve as a good chapter. That is my only guess.
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A marriage? If it's your marriage, congratulations!
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....Well, you win the award for shortest spork. Your conciseness is impressive.
But did Eragon seriously fap to magic video of Arya? I wouldn't be surprised, and the first time I read your spork I just passed over it...
I actually didn't expect dragon eggs, possibly because I never bothered developing expectations, possibly because I didn't think Paolini would be that lame. Saphira's whole shtick is that she's the last female dragon! Lame.
But did Eragon seriously fap to magic video of Arya? I wouldn't be surprised, and the first time I read your spork I just passed over it...
I actually didn't expect dragon eggs, possibly because I never bothered developing expectations, possibly because I didn't think Paolini would be that lame. Saphira's whole shtick is that she's the last female dragon! Lame.
Conciseness is a virtue. It helps when nothing actually happens.
Paolini doesn't say of Eragon fapped to magic Arya video, that's just an educated guess.
Paolini doesn't say of Eragon fapped to magic Arya video, that's just an educated guess.
I would be surprised if the spork for the chapter after the next one wasn't shorter. It's technically only 1 page long.
I hate this series . . .
That's why we're all here isn't it?
They mind-raped him to know his intentions. Never mind that they've watched him for God knows how long. Never mind that most of the stuff they made him do doesn't have anything to do with intentions. What's that, you say? Mind-raping is supposed to be painful, immoral, and something you're only supposed to do with no other options available? Nope, nope, and nope. What were they going to do if they didn't like his intentions anyway? Well, they know his true name now, so one could imagine.
So basically, Eragon's true name was treated like a password. How unimaginative.
He doesn't need to know it, but maybe they want it in case he starts turning Evil. Not that they would have any trouble subduing him without it.
Nope. Not trouble at all. They could introduce him to drawing with chalk and then bash him over the head while he was busy staring at the chalk dust on his thumbs. :P
Of course, if he did say his true name, and we must assume he did since one cannot lie in the language of magic, and a true name is the very essence of who a person is, then shouldn't they have already known who is is in every possible since of the concept?
then shouldn't they have already known who is is in every possible since of the concept?
^I'm not sure what you're trying to say here. Should have known that who is what?
^I'm not sure what you're trying to say here. Should have known that who is what?
I think he's saying that Eragon was already forced to give his true name, which basically reveals everything about him, so there was no need for that Tin Man figure to go through his mind.
Pretty much this. Eragon using his true name was made inconsequential with the mind search. He might as well have used a different word altogether if it was just going to be used as a password instead of a security system that checks for the trustworthy. Well, trustworthy as in he's a nice guy. Honestly they should've put some additional puzzles and traps where only the approved can go through and only the smart approved ones at that. Would've weeded out Eragon quite easily if the traps were made by someone with imagination.
Oh, well maybe. It's not like Paolini is going to have his true name describe him as a sociopath like he truly is.
^ This.
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Yay, only one more until my next turn!
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I personally regret not joining this group earlier so I could take more myself! :) Lol.
To be fair, it's been way too long since I've commented or posted here anyway... I have been reading the journal though.
To be fair, it's been way too long since I've commented or posted here anyway... I have been reading the journal though.
If I find myself unable to get any of mine done, you'll be the first to know about it :)
Yeah. Me too. I missed the initial sign-up - I read for ages, but never posted. Anyone who doesn't want to do a chapter, let me know.
It's pretty strange to have "part 1" of a chapter and "part 2" It can be done (read The Book Thief) but here, of course , it's stupid I did once plan to do it in a novel of mine, but that was when I was 10 or so...
I will admit that it was a good idea for him to have eggs in the VOS and not just Eldunari. It gave somewhat of a twist (a very small one) to what everyone expected. Of course, the fact that there were Eldunari in the VOS anyway meant that there still wasn't much surprise with it.
God, I think my period keyboard key is broken!
I will admit that it was a good idea for him to have eggs in the VOS and not just Eldunari. It gave somewhat of a twist (a very small one) to what everyone expected. Of course, the fact that there were Eldunari in the VOS anyway meant that there still wasn't much surprise with it.
God, I think my period keyboard key is broken!
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Anonymous
Been watching Hocus Pocus?
It may've also been a good twist if Eragon's destiny was not to defeat and dethrone Galbatorix but just to help revive the dragon riders in a new land where the next generation wouldn't be subjected or given destiny pressures like Murtagh and Eragon were respectfully.
But no.
But no.
OK: we know poor PaoPao loves his thesaurus beyond the edge of reason, but even a thesaurus should have told him that lacuna means 'hiatus, blank, missing portion'. To make any sense, a chapter called 'Lacuna' should consist simply of blank pages; or, if we take it in a more figurative sense, one in which the characters are just kicking their heels while nothing happens at all. We've had plenty of chapters like that, but weirdly this 'lacuna' is full of more actual action than any of the last half dozen chapters. WTF?
Not having read the book, I'm going to venture a guess that the stylistic weirdness - that is, the brevity and the chapter break - are to set the section apart from the rest of the series. Paolini regards this event as central to his story so he's using narrative semantics to draw attention to it and give it oomph. It strikes me as excessively nitpicky to criticize the chapter length. There are very good authors who use the occasional single page chapter, Arthur C. Clarke in 2001 for example. The split is strange, but it's forgiveable. It could be done to try to suggest a massive turning point for the world, an epoch shift - as in, everything is going to be different now that there are more dragon eggs, and the moment of discovery is the bridge between those two eras.
I like the image - the tin man, the sparkle walls. But then interesting imagery has always been Paolini's strong point, and obvious priority. Why he would have the tin man welcome them (instead of continue to challenge them) is beyond me. It might have been a moment for Eragon to be faced with the giants of his ancestors, a decent I'm-not-worthy moment. Cliche, but at least there would be SOME tension. The failure to create dramatic tension when confronting his hero with an ancient guardian robot is simply breathtaking. Built-in conflict, and Paolini biffs it. Can't have things like drama getting in the way of our scenery porn, I suppose.
I like the image - the tin man, the sparkle walls. But then interesting imagery has always been Paolini's strong point, and obvious priority. Why he would have the tin man welcome them (instead of continue to challenge them) is beyond me. It might have been a moment for Eragon to be faced with the giants of his ancestors, a decent I'm-not-worthy moment. Cliche, but at least there would be SOME tension. The failure to create dramatic tension when confronting his hero with an ancient guardian robot is simply breathtaking. Built-in conflict, and Paolini biffs it. Can't have things like drama getting in the way of our scenery porn, I suppose.
There are good authors that can successfully split chapters apart as Paolini tried to do, but Paolini is not one of them. Instead of emphasis, it feels unnecessary and slows the pacing down when this sort of thing would normally have the reader sucked into it. Instead, it breaks it apart and disjoints the events and pulls the reader out when it should keep the reader held, building tension and suspension. It also feels strange because Paolini hasn't really done this before and writes chapter lengths according to events meaning that, under his typical writing style, these three chapters should've been one normal length chapter in the book. Because of that, it feels inconsistent and strange with the rest of the book itself.
Then there are people who don't use chapters at all. Terry Pratchett, for one, basically asked, "What's the point of chapters in adult books? Why don't you just use a bookmark?"
How does he handle POV swaps or drastic changes in scenery or time?
Anonymous
Line breaks, like
this.
this.
So he effectively has chapter breaks, but refuses to call them such.
btw if you want to be snarky...log in and quit being a coward
btw if you want to be snarky...log in and quit being a coward
Not really, I think. Spaces like that are commonplace even in books that have chapters; chapters add the whole "new page, big font" deal that takes up space and adds fanfare that's often unnecessary. In my experience, chapter breaks are more about separating themed sections (i.e. a chapter for a battle, then a chapter for the aftermath, etc.) than just switching points of few and/or time.
Wasn't being snarky, sorry! And I don't have an account, so I have to be anon.
Wasn't being snarky, sorry! And I don't have an account, so I have to be anon.
November 17 2012, 23:40:36 UTC
Ugh.