Chapter Thirty-Five – By the Banks of Lake Leona

[pangolin20]

Rorschach wrote in antishurtugal, 2012-05-28 15:09:00
Inheritance Spork, Chapter 35: By the Banks of Lake Leona

Chapter Thirty-Five - By the Banks of Lake Leona

And at long last, we get to this chapter, where Eragon truly reveals himself to be an utterly despicable human being.

(Again).

Eragon is stalking through camp with his fists clenched and jaw set. We learn that he’s been in a big conference over the last few hours with the head honchos of the Varden. Then they telepathically contacted Queen Islanzadi to tell her Wyrden is dead.

Eragon had not enjoyed explaining to the queen how one of her oldest and most powerful spell casters had died, nor had the queen been pleased to receive the news (page 336).

Well. Duh.

Her initial reaction had been one of such sadness, it surprised him; he had not thought she knew Wyrden that well (page 336).

That’s our Eragon. Surprised when people are saddened by death. Then, this is the guy who plays with knocked-out teeth on the battlefield.

Anyway, this has left Eragon in a “foul mood”, so he stalks around the camp looking for his “prey”. And eventually he finds Elva, sitting there making a cat’s cradle. For awhile he stands there looking at her, until finally Elva calls him out and tells him not to lose his nerve. And Eragon lets her have it:

“You killed Wyrden - you killed him as surely as if you had stabbed him yourself. If you had come with us, you could have warned him about the trap. You could have warned all of us. I watched Wyrden die, and I watched Arya tear half her hand off, because of you. Because of your anger. Because of your stubbornness. Because if your pride… Hate me if you will, but don’t you dare make anyone else suffer for it” (pages 337-338).

Let’s back up a little bit here. As you may remember, Elva is a year and a half old. She’s spent essentially her entire life in unbelievable, constant agony because she can feel the pain of everyone around her - and being on the move with an army fighting frequent battles only exacerbates that. Elva, entirely due to Eragon’s dumbassery, has lived a life more horrible than any person in all of existence. In her own words, from Brisingr:

“Night and day I have no respite from the pain of the world. Since Eragon blessed me, I have known nothing but hurt and fear, never happiness or pleasure. The lighter side of life, the things that make this existence bearable, these are denied me. Never do I see them. Never do I share in them. Only darkness. Only the combined misery of all the men, women, and children within a mile, battering at me like a midnight storm.”

I honestly don’t know what Elva hasn’t committed suicide already, because suicide sounds like a much more pleasant alternative to the life Eragon gave her.

Now let’s go back to the conversation they had when they were talking about bringing Elva along in the first place. Even Nasuada, who is a despicably unlikable character when it comes to Elva, has a moment of humanity:

“I dislike the thought of sending a child - even one as gifted as Elva - into battle.” (page 266)

Of course, she still is okay with Eragon asking Elva to accompany them.

Angela even makes a rational argument:

“As long as the pain of those around her doesn’t overwhelm her,” said Angela. “The last few battles have left her curled in a ball, barely able to move or breathe.” (page 266)

Okay, so they have a toddler who is a loose cannon, who may or may not be of any help and likely will be rendered inert by the fact that they are sneaking into a hostile city and there will be people brutally killing each other. In addition, this toddler is someone who has lived a life of unimaginable pain and misery. She owes them nothing, and she does not have any responsibility to help them in any way, shape or form. Were Eragon and Nasuada compassionate people, they’d send her away from the battles to a nice village on a mountainside where she could live her life in peace and not be subjected to unspeakable pain every single day of her life. But no: because she can help them in their fight, they want her to help them. Because someone who is a year and a half old should be forced to choose sides in a war she has absolutely no part in. Because it’s Wrong to be, I dunno, neutral?

Anyway. It didn’t work:

Elva had laughed and refused when he had asked for her help. He had argued with her long and hard, but to no avail (page 268).

Saphira even comes down to intimidate and bully Elva into helping, but it doesn’t work.

So. Back to present. Clearly, the only reason Elva refused to go into a killing zone with them was because of her anger, her pride, and her stubbornness. It couldn’t be that she was afraid for her life. Or didn’t want to experience the excruciating pain. Or just doesn’t give a fuck about helping the Varden. All of which are perfectly legitimate excuses for not going along. And so, of course, Eragon decides to go out and blame her - a little girl - for the death of someone, because he thinks that she might have been able to prevent it. Yes: he tells her, to her face, that SHE IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE DEATH OF A TRAINED MAGICIAN WHO WILLINGLY WENT INTO BATTLE FIGHTING FOR WHAT HE BELIEVED IN.

How does Paolini not understand how cruel this is? Blaming someone for the death of another person is ridiculously cruel, let alone blaming a little girl, let alone blaming her for something that is not even remotely her fault.

Eragon is a fucking asshole.

Wait, no, he isn’t. He’s the Hero. So…Elva agrees with him, because Eragon is always Right:

Elva seemed to struggle with herself. Then she nodded, and Eragon saw that she was crying, tears overflowing from her eyes. He took no pleasure in her distress, but he felt a certain amount of satisfaction that his words had affected her so strongly.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered (page 338).

And back to a life of misery for Elva!

Eragon strides away and Saphira immediately congratulates him on a job well done. And he basks in just a moment of feeling awesomely mature about himself:

Upbraiding Elva had been an unusual experience for Eragon. He remembered when Brom and Garrow had chastised him for making mistakes, and to now find himself doing to chastising left him feeling…different…more mature (page 338).

Hooray, Eragon, you just totally chewed out a toddler!

Nasuada leaves a small detachment to guard the city, and the Varden immediately leaves and marches north. Before they go, they find Wyrden’s body, and they all search for Eragon’s magic belt but can’t find it. They bury Wyrden next to a creek and plant an acorn above his body, and then all the elves sing the acorn into a tree that is twenty feet tall. Eragon likes the burial:

If he had to die, he decided that he would want an apple tree planted over him, so that his friends and family could eat the fruit born of his body (page 340).

That just sounds vaguely perverted.

Eragon also frees all the slaves, which is nice of him, and then he hangs out with Arya for a bit. Then he invites Arya into his tent [!!!] and she accepts and pulls out a bottle of liqueur, which apparently she found among Wyrden’s belongings and so she wants to enjoy it with Eragon. Apparently among the elves, when someone dies that means everyone else gets to steal their shit.

He and Arya proceed to get drunk together. We get lots of description about exactly what it feels like to be drunk. I have a feeling that this chapter was written about Paolini got drunk for the first time and felt like writing about it.

Anyway, one thing leads to another and suddenly Arya turns and kisses Eragon, and he kisses her back and then they start tearing off each other’s clothes with the pent-up aggression of two lifelong virgins - wait, never mind. That was actually what I expected to happen when I first read this chapter. Instead, Arya gets up and starts dancing to this music that is playing, and Eragon watches because that’s what he does.

You know, it’s funny, right after Eragon gave Elva a dressing down for not doing her imagined duty, here are he and Arya getting shitfaced together. Let’s not forget the Varden are on the warpath and they could be attacked at any time. Given their importance to defending the Varden, it seems pretty fucking irresponsible to just get wasted, when they both have a duty to the Varden - a real duty, not an imagined one.

Still, Eragon can do no wrong, so imagine nothing will come of this - nope, suddenly there’s a roar of a dragon, and he realizes it’s not Saphira.

Whoops.

47 comments

[1]
Deleted comment

[1A]

torylltales
May 29 2012, XX:XX:XX UTC
(Replying just to keep this near the top where people can see...)

Next chapters:

Chapter Thirty Six: The Word of a Rider - dibbed by [info]distinctvaguens
Chapter Thirty Seven: Conclave of Kings - [info]pipedreamno20
Chapter Thirty Eight: A Maze Without End - [info]7th_y

[1A1]

Anonymous
December 26 2012, 17:12:37 UTC
Well posted. All I can say is ... Christopher Paolini, if he realizes that one of his excuses for plots or subplots became potentially interesting, he devotes serious effort to killing it.

[2]

randombattlecry
May 29 2012, 01:05;21 UTC
The whole feeling-mature-because-he-chastised-a-child thing sounds like he was punished for something as a child, held on to his resentment for years, unleashed it on someone else, and then decided it was mature and virtuous instead of uncalled-for. I'm sensing an overload of author avatar in that bit.

Also:

If he had to die, he decided that he would want an apple tree planted over him, so that his friends and family could eat the fruit born of his body.

I think someone got the wrong idea from Secret Window...

[3]

mage_apprentice
May 29 2012, 01:59:09 UTC
If he had to die, he decided that he would want an apple tree planted over him, so that his friends and family could eat the fruit born of his body (page 340).
That just sounds vaguely perverted.
Sounds like something I'd do, but that's because I want my body to act as fertilizer in the form of ashes for the tree (as long as it's not a weed tree, that is).

*in response to the chapter* . . . I've got a spitefic but this comment won't post with it in. Really annoying.

[3A]

predak123
May 29 2012, 18:28:08 UTC
See, I don't have an issue with wanting to become part of the Circle of Life and whatnot, but when you start going "I WANT MY LOVED ONES TO EAT ME AFTER I DIE," it gets a little, erm, creepy.

[3A1]

mage_apprentice
May 29 2012, 19:12:56 UTC
Which highlights one of Paolini's major problems: wording. Many of the issues in Inheritance could've been solved by just fixing the diction. It's outright annoying.

[3A2]

Anonymous
May 29 2012, 22:09:42 UTCc
Yes, I found that a little unsettling as well. Apple tree: good. Wanting the apple tree so people can eat apples fertilized by your decaying corpse: O_o

[3A3]

Anonymous
May 30 2012, 02:25:35 UTC
Agreed. It's like carving a piece of your thigh off and saying "Mother, thou mayst partake of my flesh."
It's not quite as bad as that, but I was being sarcastic to illustrate my point.

[4]

torylltales
May 29 2012, 0X:XX:XX UTC
Absolutely despicable. The lowest of the low. I mean, Elva had the power to prevent all that senseless* pain at the cost of her own wellbeing, and she chose her own happiness? Selfish!

Oh right, she's less than two years old, in constant unending and unimaginable pain, being more or less forced to endure all the pain of every warrior within a mile of her in the middle of a military coup, and refuses to put herself in a situation that will cause her enough pain to render her helpless from sheer pain in the middle of enemy territory?

Honestly, the fact that she's an infant, civilian, and a non-combatant ?(I would also consider her a hostage) is enough reason for her to not be sent on a mission into known enemy territory in the middle of a bloody WAR.

* senseless in that, come on, they're a troop of covert ops infiltrators trying to invade a known hostile environment, and they weren't on the lookout for any kind of traps or ambushes? Generic Elf Warrior # 12 would have died eventually, magical amethyst trap or not, just from... what? Hubris? Stupidity? Recklessness? Foolhardiness? Impatience? Simultaneously failing his Spot, Listen, and Find Traps checks? fail to see how any of that is the fault, directly or otherwise, of a civilian noncombatant who didn't want to go (and honestly had no business being there).

[4A]

mage_apprentice
May 29 2012, 08:34:40 UTC
Not to mention that just because she can take away pain doesn't mean that she's suddenly an alarm against traps. Sure, her "gift" could sense the intentions of an assassin, but that's probably not a failsafe against inanimate objects. Maybe she could feel the pain in place of Failed-the-Find-Traps-Check Elf but that wouldn't stop him from bleeding out (which is actually on Eragon and any healing-capable mages in the group).

[5]

Anonymous
May 29 2012, 08:15:06 UTC
Going to be honest, phrased differently and if Eragon actually was a vegetarian, peace-loving, not-a-psychopath, the apple tree idea could sort of work. You'd have to rewrite about nine-tenths of Eragon's character but it's workable.

[6]

dr_doomsduck
May 29 2012, 09:13:09 UTC
Ah, this chapter! The one that made me want throw the book at the wall. Despicable, damn right!

Can we also focus on the fact that it was Eragon's fault that Elva was submitted to the agony and horrors in the first place? He should be groveling at her feet!

In some of the later chapters Galbatorix uses children as some sort of meat-shield and Eragon was all disgusted, but by then I was going "Dude, like you haven't done worse to Elva".

To me, the Varden are as bad, if not worse than the guy they're trying to beat.

[6A]

aikaterini
May 30 2012, 16:21:19 UTC
/Can we also focus on the fact that it was Eragon's fault that Elva was submitted to the agony and horrors in the first place? He should be groveling at her feet!/

No, because then the narrator would have to admit that Eragon was *wrong* and that he seriously messed up. Besides, Eragon grovels to no one! Not even to a poor little girl that he cursed from the cradle! (Umm, Mr. Paolini, you are aware that characters who put a curse on babies are typically portrayed as *villains,* right? Unless you were trying to subvert the trope by making the character a good person who made a disastrous mistake...except then the character would actually have to feel *guilt* and try to make amends for that mistake)

/In some of the later chapters Galbatorix uses children as some sort of meat-shield and Eragon was all disgusted, but by then I was going "Dude, like you haven't done worse to Elva"./

I can't wait until the sporking of that chapter because, yes, Eragon's hypocrisy there is staggering.

[7]

distinctvaguens
May 29 2012, 16:37:42 UTC Edited: May 29 2012, 18:36:16 UTC
This chapter has so much to rip into. The situation with Elva has been addressed by many and I made a big deal out of it in my review as well but one other huge issue I have with this chapter is the "getting drunk" scene. Paolini utterly failed here. Eragon and Arya take the potion from Wydren's stuff and without any justification the two drink it for fun! They don't even think about Wydren during this entire scene! They specifically say they want a release due to the the vague fighting and killing of the last few days NOT due to grief or depression. I can't repeat enough how messed up it is. They couldn't care less. What if this was some special drink from his family or he was saving to give to someone? Whatever, loot his corpse. He could have shown a different side of Arya or Eragon, finally cracking under the stress of war and losing a close friend, but no. They stole the dead guys drink for a laugh. (and plot contrivance in the next chapter) And to pair this scene with a scene of sheer disconnect after Eragon feels all high and mighty for idiotically guilt tripping a little girl to tears proves how out of touch Eragon (and Paolini) are with reality.

[7A]

aikaterini
May 30 2012, 16:27:55 UTC
And who the heck was Wydren, in the grand scheme of things? If Roran or even Nasuada had died instead, I could understand Eragon's level of irrational anger, but Wydren? What great importance did he have, when it all came down to it? And yet he's worth the shaming and guilt-tripping of a little girl? And yes, way to prove how noble you were in using his name as an excuse to browbeat Elva by instantly forgetting about him afterwards, Eragon. If you ask me, Eragon just wanted an excuse to be a spiteful, heartless bully.

[8]

syntinen_laulu
May 29 2012, 17:49:15 UTC
I simply can't believe Paolini hasn't been called out by his fans over the whole Elva plotline. Have there been no protests on the fanboards at all? Nobody's bothered by the immorality, cruelty and total lack of empathy that every in the Varden is showing to this kid?

[9]

Anonymous
May 30 2012, 04:29:18 UTC
SO I CAME HERE
AND SHED A SINGLE TEAR
YOU'RE STILL BASHEN MY MAN
ERAGON WHO JUST GOT A TAN

PLEASE STOP THIS HATE
BEFORE ME AND ERAGON MATE
HE'S NOT HAPPY
AND I'M FEELIN SAPPY

ERAGON'S GONNA COME
AND THEN THIS SITE IS DOWN
CAUSE HE'S GONNA KILL IT
THAT'S RIGHt FEAR IT

I'm ERAGON'S WIFE!



[9A]

Anonymous
May 30 2012, 06:36:35 UTC
If you're a troll, my friend, you're wasting your talent. If you are Eragon's wife I implore you, leave him. He will turn on you too.

[9B]

venusrain
May 30 2012, 11:27:38 UTC Edited: May 30 2012, 11:27:59 UTC
You're probably just a mildly entertaining troll, but if you believe what you say is true: Eragon is not your animuliterary husbando. He is a collection of poorly-chosen words on a page. You are not snogging him on the astral plane.

...Now there's a sentence I'd never thought i'd write.

[9B1]

Anonymous
May 30 2012, 11:46:24 UTC
That anon was just being sarcastic.

[9B1A]

venusrain
May 30 2012, 12:36:59 UTC
This is the internet; it's hard to tell if someone's being sarcastic about waifu-type things. I mean, i know i am when I joke around about how [character] is my waifu, but there are some people who honest to god believe that they are married to [character] on the astral plane.

Granted I don't think they'd come here of all communities, but hey, gotta cover all the bases.

[9B1A1]

predak123
May 30 2012, 18:25:10 UTC
Are all of our anons in this com snarky bastards? I swear, half of the "arguments" we end up with in the comments is due to a sarcastic anon being misunderstood. I've come to just expect sarcasm from our bag-wearing guests.

[9B1A1A]

torylltales
May 3X 2012, XX:XX:XX UTC
I think this is the most brilliant troll I've come across in recent years. "shed a single tear"? PLEASE. Troll.

[9B1A1B]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 02:31:26 UTC
Well, we can't spork on AS. Where else are we to be snarky about Paolini's "work" except in the comments? But, yes, all of the arguments due to misunderstandings are a nasty consequence.

[9C]

Anonymous
May 30 2012, 16:07:56 UTC
Ooo, can you introduce me to Beren son of Barahir? Squee!

[9D]

mage_apprentice
May 30 2012, 17:15:46 UTC
Your "husband" is a
Damn monster from the deepest,
Darkest pits of hell.

Eat my haiku!

[9E]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 01:03:47 UTC
Did you really just rhyme it with it?

[9F]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 03:48:47 UTC
YOU GUYS ARE STILL TALKING SMACK
ABOUT MY MAN, CHILL LACK
YOU SAY HE'S PSYCHO
BUT HE'S A HERO

HIS JOB HIS VERY ROUGH
AND HE IS SUPER TOUGH
NO ONE OF YOU COULD DO IT
SO JUST ADMIT IT

YOU ARE ALL JEALOUS
SO GO READ AN ATLAS
AND STOP COMPLAINING
CAUSE NO ONE WANTS TO HERE YOUR WHINING

PAO-PAO IS SUPER WELL WRITER
NONE OF YOUR WORKS COULD BE BETTER
YOU ARE ANGREY HATERS
JUST A BUNCNCH OF UGLY BEAVERS

SEE YOU AROUND FOOLS
CAREFUL NOT TO DROOL
YO I'M ERAGON'S WIFE
PEACEOUT, WILDLIFE

[9F1]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 17:42:30 UTC
There you go rhyming it with it again. It's not like purple. It can be rhymed! Here let me try.

So just admit you're an idiot.
and you are all jealous.

[9F1A]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 20:46:06 UTC
YOU ARE NOT VERY BRIGHT
LET ME TURN ON A LIGHT
IT CAN RHYME WITH IT
SO GET OVER IT

I DON'T WANT TO USE OTHER CHOICES
I SHALL REJOICE
FOR I SHALL RHYME IT WITH IT
WHENEVER I FEEL LIKE IT

[9F1A1]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 23:03:42 UTC
Oh, so you want to insult to me, do you now? Allow me to retort. (Sarcasm ahead.)

Wow that poem is beautiful. It completely wins we over to your argument! Allow me, I implore, allow me please to slit my throat as a blood offering to the god of poetry that is you.

Yeah, you can rhyme it with it. It's just not very creative.
You can also use ad hominem with the wanton abandon of an immature child.
You can also use the uppercase perpetually, but that's just immature.
Yes, little troll, you can do all of things. But you should know that you make a ass troll out of yourself by doing them.
It makes poeple think less of your opinions.

Honestly, if you want to be a fan, then come up with a logical argument and I'll hear you out.

Also, why did you refer to yourself as it?

By the way, I'm insulting you. I state this other rather blatantly obvious fact, just in case you don't have the intelligence to make that inference.



[9F1A1A]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 23:25:33 UTC
I probably should not have posted that. I need to stop letting trolls get under my skin.

[9F1A1A1]

mage_apprentice
June 1 2012, 00:00:13 UTC
Yeah, you really shouldn't have gone on. This particular troll is just a flash-in-the-pan kinda troll. Boring, too.

[9F1A1A1A]

Anonymous
June 1 2012, 01:11:42 UTC
Agreed.
For the record, those 2 under the troll aren't me.

[9F1A1B]

Anonymous
May 31 2012, 23:27:04 UTC
WOW YOU'RE INSULTS ARE REALLY LAME
THANKS FOR TELLING ME, DAME
IF YOU HAD SAID NOTHING ABOUT IT
THEN I WOULD HAVE NEVER KNOWN ABOUT IT

YOU SHOULD WORK ON YOUR INSULTS
CAUSE THAT WAS REALLY BAD INSULT

I KNOW YOU'LL SAY THE SAME TO
BUT GUESS WHAT I BE
AWEOME AND U JEALOUS FOOL
TRY NOT TO DROOL

[9F1A1B1]

Anonymous
June 1 2012, 00:42:54 UTC
Lol, I'm boring? All people do on this site is make fun of other people's writing. It's rarely even in a nice, helpful way. People seem to go out of their way to make fun of others writing. I'm sure all of you once wrote horrible stories, sure you didn't get them published, but do you really need to bash others? To me, it seems like you guys are just a bunch jealous writers who never caught a break in the publishing world. To get rid of your anger, you take it out on other writers who got published.

I doubt I'll come back to this site. There's to

[9F1A1B1A]

Anonymous
June 1 2012, 00:44:09 UTC
Good luck on your pathetic writing careers.

[9F1A1B1B]

mage_apprentice
June 1 2012, 02:04:13 UTC
Yes, you are boring. You repeat the same stupid ad hominem arguments that we've heard over and over. Further more, YOU came HERE. We didn't go to Shurtugal.com to troll and stayed in our own corner. Next time you troll, do something more original.

[9F1A1B1B1]

Anonymous
June 1 2012, 03:16:02 UTC
I love how everyone expects trolls to be orginal. There's never going to be an orginal troll. They are just people who try to upset everyone else just because they want to see people's reactions to their stupid post.

[9F1A1B1B2]

torylltales
June 1 2012, XX:XX:XX UTC
You said the word! The word!


[10]

charlottehywd
May 30 2012, 17:42:47 UTC
Poor, poor Elva.

Why are we supposed to like the Varden again?

[10A]

mage_apprentice
May 30 2012, 17:52:17 UTC
Because they're the Heroes. That's the only real reason we're given.

*sigh* Paolini is such a blind writer.

[10A1]

charlottehywd
May 30 2012, 18:08:20 UTC
And now I sort of wonder how one can be more self aware in their own writing. I certainly hope that I don't write like that. Is there a trick or just a sort of self awareness that can't be taught?

[10A1A]

mage_apprentice
May 30 2012, 18:43:05 UTC
It's a little both. One way to check for bad writing is to set your work aside and let it sit for a bit before rereading it (and that will usually do it). Another way that can't really be taught is to not have too big of an ego for understanding that anyone, especially yourself, can write in crappy ways. That will open yourself up for criticism and seeing the flaws in your work. Other than that, I can see it as sort of instinctive since a lot of writers (or anyone in the fine arts) tend to be perfectionists.

[10A1A1]

charlottehywd
May 30 2012, 18:52:27 UTC
That I am. Especially as an ex- music major, since I knew that I was pretty good, though obviously never perfect. I feel like writing is quite a bit harder for me now, though. I have all sorts of images in my head, but it's really hard to describe them. I don't fear having an ego, certainly. ;-)

[10A1B]

distinctvaguens
May 31 2012, 15:41:57 UTC
How to be more self aware: While reading your own material act like an annoying 5 year old constantly asking "Why?" If you can't answer those questions you might have plot holes or a confusing narrative. Not everything needs to be explained in detail but make sure a reader could have some way of answering the big "Whys".

Also if you have a month of your life to lose, read through tvtropes. It really helped me read between the lines and grew my understanding of how tropes can work or become cliche. It helped me understand how to keep things fresh and also inspired new ideas.

[10A1B1]

charlottehywd
May 31 2012, 17:55:40 UTC
Wow, that makes a lot of sense. Thanks! :-)

[11]

Anonymous
June 2 2012, 22:24:02 UTC
Okay, I may be wrong here, but I thought Elva's powers were more along the lines of "Sense Motive" than being able to perceive unthinking threats like traps. She can sense pain as it happens, but I don't recall her ever being capable of sensing future suffering. The only reason she was able to prevent future pain for Nasuada was because she could sense the unease of her assassins and intercept them because of that. If that's the case, Eragon's not only being a callous, sociopathic bastard, but also outright interpreting the two-year-old's powers wrong. Even if she was brought along, she couldn't have done anything to prevent the pain of an unthinking trap, so Eragon's tirade is entirely groundless. This chapter is AWFUL.