Brisingr Spork Chapter 47: Inheritance
May. 14th, 2024 05:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pangolin20 posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
as_sporkive
snarkbotanya wrote in antishurtugal, 2018-07-31 04:46:00
Brisingr Spork Chapter 47: Inheritance
Hello, everyone, Anya here, and—HOLY SHIT DUCK AND COVER!
[Caption: Gif of an anvil falling into a room and two people just ducking away.]
*dusts off* Goddamn, that was a close one.
Anyway, welcome to Chapter 47 of Brisingr, titled with the most painful series title drop I’ve seen in a long, long time. It’s pretty short as far as Paochapters go, but don’t think that means it’ll be easy. This is the chapter where Saphira becomes a holodeck, and I’m going to have quite a lot to say about it.
We start pretty much exactly where we left off, with Eragon just having heard all of Oromis’s explanatory bullshit that makes this probably-planned twist come off as a giant retcon. And yes, I do believe that Brom was intended to be Eragon’s father all along. Paoini may write by the seat of his pants quite a lot, but he does plan out major aspects of the story; for reference, see the ending of Inheritance and the dream sequence in Eragon which is basically the same scene but without the massive amounts of padding. Brom being Eragon’s father was pretty obviously foreshadowed; in particular, I remember a scene where Eragon asked him if he knew his mother, and Brom said that he knew her “enough to miss her when she was gone”.
Unfortunately for Paolini, he… well, he did what Toryll and Epistler pointed out, basically having Eragon bring up any issue with the contrived “Brom and Selena fall in love” backstory plot that he can think of and having Oromis handwave them. Thus, we end up with something that almost certainly isn’t a retcon, but sure as hell still feels like one.
Of course, it doesn’t help at all that a lot of the bullshit surrounding the “Brom is Eragon’s father” reveal actually is a huge pile of retconning. I heavily suspect that what Paolini did here was write himself into a corner: he had this dramatic reveal planned, but when the time came to actually reveal it, he realized that it made no sense. However, instead of changing the circumstances of the reveal, he tried to haphazardly patch it together and make it make sense. This chapter is basically the epitome of that. Why the hell would Brom have had Saphira make a mental recording? When was it ever established that dragons had the ability to do such a thing? They aren't fucking holodecks, so... what the hell?
Basically, this whole thing is a partial-retcon strategy that works out pretty much never.
Speaking of things that work out pretty much never, I’d like to submit “overdescribing everything your character does for the sake of padding” as an item for the list, as displayed in the first paragraph of today’s chapter:
Eragon remained sitting at the round table for several minutes, then he stood and walked to the edge of the Crags of Tel’naeir, where he gazed out over the rolling forest a thousand feet below. With the tip of his left boot, he pushed a pebble over the cliff and watched it bounce off the slanted face of the stone until it vanished into the depths of the canopy.
Good god. Seriously, guys, imagine if I wrote Consequence like this:
Vanora stared at the freckles on the backs of her hands, wove her fingers together, and pushed, hoping the muffled cracks of the tense joints would relieve her nerves.
It’s padded, awkward, and gives the impression that the author is so convinced that the readers are all morons. I mean, why else would anyone feel the need to describe the process of knuckle-cracking or idle pebble-kicking?
This is so egregious, I have to put in a There, I Fixed It version:
Eragon tried to stay where he was, but found that impossible. His head was spinning, his thoughts stubbornly refusing to arrange themselves. Sighing, he stood and walked to the edge of the Crags of Tel’naeir, where he paced awkwardly for a moment, occasionally stopping to kick a pebble off the cliff and watch it fall.
What this scene needs, above all, is some kind of emotion. Paolini was clearly going for dazed confusion, but what he got was utter boredom, because he constantly refuses to get out of the way and let the characters show us how they feel. By expressing what Eragon is doing in simpler language and emphasizing what’s going on in his head, I’ve allowed him to do that.
Saphira comes up behind Eragon, all timid and crouching, and asks if he’s angry with her. It is never a good thing when your badass dragon sounds like a battered woman talking to her abusive partner. Eragon says he’s not mad, and says he wishes Brom had told him about their familial relationship… or rather, that he wishes he “hadn’t felt it necessary to hide the truth”, which is way too obviously designed to absolve Brom of any criticism to be realistic. A teenager who just found out that their mentor was actually their father and not only never told them, but also made everyone swear unbreakable oaths not to tell them, would probably be harboring at least a little bitterness toward said mentor. To put it simply, this is obviously Paolini talking rather than Eragon.
Moving on, Saphira asks Eragon how he feels, and Eragon says he feels “acceptance”, but is still having trouble wrapping his head around everything.The actual lines are, of course, overwrought as all hell.
Saphira then asks if Eragon wants to see the memory Brom had her record for him now, or wait until later, and Eragon says he wants to see it now. I would understand this if not for the bizarre justification Eragon gives about how they “may never have the opportunity” if they don’t do it right away. The problem with this is that it’s far too detached; for all Paolini tries to tell us that Eragon is trying to process all this information, he sure doesn’t show it. I would expect Eragon to say something like “yes, I need an explanation now” or “no, I need to process things first”; something that indicates that his mind is indeed still trying to grasp what’s happening now. He shouldn’t be thinking about whether or not they’ll have an opportunity for something in the future like this, at least not until he’s had some time to think on everything.
Regardless, Saphira tells Eragon to “close [his] eyes and let [her] show [him] what once was”. Yep, he’s still keeping it pretentious. Brace yourselves, people, because it only gets worse.
Eragon closes his eyes, and starts to feel “everything that [Saphira] had been experiencing at the time of the memory”. I call bullshit. Saphira is not a hard drive; she’s a thinking creature with a living brain made of organic tissue, and memories stored in that are fuzzy and unreliable. Even a person with a “photographic” memory will omit some details, because the brain simply isn’t wired to store everything like that. And no, “she’s a dragon and it’s magic” does not justify it; that shit is on the level of “a wizard teleported my homework into the dog’s mouth”.
Anyway, the memory takes place in a glade near the Spine, and it’s all very lavishly described, but two things in particular stuck out to me. First, there’s another case of wood being referred to as “punky”, which seems, judging by the discussion of it that we had last time it was used, to be not just an Americanism, but specifically a rural Americanism. Get outside your bubble, Paolini; it’ll help you not use words that make us think the wood has a pink mohawk and multiple eyebrow piercings.
The second is that the lichen on the trees is described as “chartreuse”. Oddly enough, this isn’t completely inaccurate; some lichens are pretty damn colorful. However, using the word “chartreuse” to describe it is anachronistic and clashes with the setting. The color chartreuse was named after a French liqueur introduced in the 1700’s. Most of Alaglag appears to be stuck in the dark ages, or the High Medieval era at the latest, and there is no France. They should not be describing things as “chartreuse”.
Finally, after all that bloated, anachronistic, rural-American description, we get a one-sentence paragraph introducing Brom, sitting in the middle of the clearing on a log. Then we get a bit of bloated description of the man himself, and then a paragraph of him not moving and then finally setting up to go into Lecture Mode.
This is incredibly poor pacing. Paolini is obviously trying mightily to build up tension. “What’s Brom going to say?” we’re supposed to wonder. “What were his reasons for all of this? What advice is he going to give?”
Instead, what Paolini has done is bog down the narrative with unnecessary description that just opens up a metric buttload of headscratchers. I’m not wondering what Brom’s going to say; I’m wondering why the fuck Saphira bothered to show Eragon all this goddamn setup. Cut to the chase, dammit!
[Caption: Monty Python 'Get on with it!' gif]
Of course, then Brom speaks, and I immediately regret wanting to cut to the chase, because this is the note upon which he begins.
Brom said, “Ever the sun traces its path from horizon to horizon, and ever the moon follows, and ever the days roll past without care for the lives they grind away, one by one.” Lowering his eyes, Brom gazed straight at Saphira and, through her, Eragon. “Try though they might, no being escapes death forever, not even the elves or the spirits. To all, there is an end. If you are watching me, Eragon, then my end has come and I am dead and you know that I am your father.”
*groans and tugs at her hair* Ugghhh… goddammit, I need a haircut. If it’s long enough for me to grasp, it’s too long.
That is such a load of pretentious bullshit that if I barfed right now, it would be purple. Brom, you are leaving a message to your son, not writing a philosophical treatise! And heck, even if you were writing a treatise, it would be highly advisable for you to fill it with actual philosophy rather than these obvious fucking platitudes. Blech… I’m beginning to really remember why I hate Brom.
Also, that last sentence is very clumsily constructed. “My end has come and I am dead”? Paging the Department of Redundancy Department!
If I wanted to give Paolini credit, I would say that the redundancy there was a result of him putting both ideas in to decide which one to use during editing. Unfortunately for him, he’s done this kind of shit so many times that I’m pretty sure it’s intentional, and that he actually thought that having both there would be a good thing.
Brom pulls out his pipe and uses magic to light it, because of course he does, and… OH SHIT, TAKE COVER!
[Caption: Gif of an anvil falling into a room and two people just ducking away.]
[Caption: Warning sign for falling anvils.]
Anyway, Brom continues with this non-sequitur.
“If you do see this, Eragon, I hope that you are safe and happy and that Galbatorix is dead. However, I realize that’s unlikely, if for no other reason than you are a Dragon Rider, and a Dragon Rider may never rest while there is injustice in the land.”
The first sentence kind of makes sense as a followup to Brom’s previous bit of drivel, but the second is utter nonsense. Why would Eragon being a Dragon Rider mean that he hasn’t killed Galbatorix, and why would him seeing this
Of course, that question is rhetorical, because I know Paolini isn’t actually trying to say anything. He thinks he is, but all he’s really trying to do is be “epic”.
Brom chuckles like the mentally-stunted dickcheese he is and starts going all old-man-ramble on us. And yes, I am going to continue to show you all of his words just so that you know exactly what I’m talking about when I rip them apart. Heck, you know what? I’m just going to take this shit line by fucking line.
You and your creator both, Brom.
In the pursuit of brevity, 
[Caption: Gif of Jack Nicholson laughing uproariously]
I shall assume that Saphira has already told you how your mother and I met, how Selena died, and how I came to be in Carvahall. I wish that you and I could have this talk face to face, Eragon, and perhaps we still shall and Saphira will have no need to share this memory with you, but I doubt it.
The sorrows of my years press on me, Eragon, and I feel a cold creeping into my limbs the likes of which has never troubled me before. I think it is because I know it is now your turn to take up the standard.
[Caption: Woman saying 'Blah blah blah!' again a podium background.]
There is much I still hope to accomplish, but none of it is for myself, only for you, and you shall eclipse everything I have done. Of that, I am sure.
Let’s see… you were an asshole, and he’s going to become a psychopath… yeah, I think that might very well count. Not the way you wanted it to, but as the philosopher Jagger once said, you can’t always get what you want.
Before my grave closes over me, though, I wanted to be able, at least this once, to call you my son… My son… Your whole life, Eragon, I have longed to reveal to you who I was. It has been a pleasure like no other for me to watch you growing up, but also a torture like no other because of the secret I held in my heart.”
Considering everything Toryll and Epistler said in the last couple sporks? Yeah, cry me a fucking river.
[Caption: Gif of man playing a very tiny violin.]
Brom laughed then, a harsh, barking sound.
Does this chucklehead ever stop laughing? First it was that weird chuckle, now this doggie-laughter.
“Well, I didn’t exactly manage to keep you safe from the Empire, now did I? If you are still wondering who was responsible for Garrow’s death, you need look no further, for here he sits. It was my own foolishness. I should never have returned to Carvahall. And now look: Garrow dead, and you a Dragon Rider. I warn you, Eragon, beware of whom you fall in love with, for fate seems to have a morbid interest in our family.”
Again… how does the latter part of that bit follow from what came before it? The first was all about how Brom’s presence put Eragon and the rest of his family in danger, and then he was suddenly talking about… falling in love? Dude, if it was your fault that Eragon became a Rider and the Empire killed his family because the call to adventure knows where you live, that doesn’t really mean that his romantic prospects are all awful by nature. It might mean that you ruined them, but not that he’s going to be unlucky in love just because “I dunno, FATEHAX!”
Also, I wouldn’t worry too much about Eragon falling in love, Brom. The sociopathic little git isn’t capable of such a thing. I’d worry far more about the object of his affections being hurt by him than by what the Empire or “fate” decided to do to fuck with him.
Wrapping his lips around the stem of his pipe, Brom drew on the smoldering cardus weed several times, blowing the chalk-white smoke off to one side.
More unnecessary description… also, who else got the mental image of Brom’s lips suddenly extending into a weird proboscis-like monstrosity to wrap around the entire pipe-stem?
The pungent smell was heavy in Saphira’s nostrils.
Oh, look, it’s our holodeck service provider! Hi, holodragon!
I’m having a hard time deciding what to make of Paolini’s mentions of Saphira’s senses in this bit, actually. The block description earlier had a mention of her Blue-O-Vision, and there was a bit about Brom looking at Eragon through her, but then she just kind of dropped off the map while Brom talked. And really, that would have been fine, because it’s just a memory of Brom talking, and we know it’s through Saphira. It feels like Paolini forgot that this was a memory, then suddenly remembered in the middle of Brom’s Pretentous Speech of Pretentiousness and thought, “oh, I should remind everyone!”
Of course, that’s not to say that leaving Saphira in the background was the only way to do this. In fact, I would argue that it would have been better to show a bit of Eragon and Saphira’s reactions to the memory as we go through this. Perhaps have there be a bit of remembered tension on Saphira’s part about not being able to tell Eragon, or have Eragon feel something when Brom calls him his son and have Saphira pause the memory to comfort him. That would actually give us some emotion in this bland chapter of holodeck speechification.
Brom said, “I have my share of regrets, but you are not one of them, Eragon.
He really should be, Brom. He really, really should be.
You may occasionally behave like a moon-addled fool,
Understatement of the Year right there… also, is “moon-addled fool” supposed to be some Arglebargian equivalent of “lunatic”? Becaue if so, you really should have tried to establish that in the previous goddamn books, Paolini.
such as letting these blasted Urgals escape, but you are no more of an idiot than I was at your age.” He nodded. “Less of an idiot, in fact.
I shudder to think of what a stupid teenager Brom must have been to be able to say that. At least we now know where Ergy gets it from.
I am proud to have you as my son, Eragon, prouder than you will ever know. I never thought that you would become a Rider as I was, nor wished that future upon you, but seeing you with Saphira, ah, it makes me feel like crowing at the sun like a rooster.”
This… actually could have been kind of decent. There’s some genuine pride in there, and if Paolini and his need to over-embellish everything could just get out of the goddamn way, then maybe it would actually come across. Trim the bit about him never thinking or wishing that Eragon would be a Rider into a smaller chunk, and it could actually work.
With his free hand, Brom grasped the sheath of his sword, the veins prominent on the back of his hand.
Use of the same word at the end of two separate clauses in the same sentence is awkward as fuck. Also, we do not need to know about Brom’s old man veins. We know that old people have very visible veins, Paolini.
He fixed the pipe in one corner of his mouth. “Right. Now, my advice is twofold.
Oh dear… it’s coming… brace yourselves, everyone.
[Caption: Chart showing how to perform the brace position, with text 'Assume brace position']
Whatever you do, protect those you care for. Without them, life is more miserable than you can imagine. An obvious statement, I know, but no less true because of it. There, that is the first part of my advice.
The first, possibly-decent-with-some-editing part. I can kind of see where he’s coming with this, considering his backstory of losing his dragon. There’s even a bit of a character voice in the whole “okay, that’s the first part done” sentence.
Unfortunately, it’s all downhill from here, because now we’re going to talk about Galbatorix.
As for the rest… If you are so fortunate as to have already killed Galbatorix—or if anyone has succeeded in slitting that traitor’s throat—then congratulations.
Wow. That’s got it all, hasn’t it? The immediate focus on murdering Galbatorix, complete with encouraging a way to do so that would probably be considered dishonorable in a medieval setting, not to mention straight-up murder, the congratulations for ending a life… yeah, all we need now is for him to go on about how insane good ol’ Galby is!
If not, then you must realize that Galbatorix is your greatest and most dangerous enemy. Until he is dead, neither you nor Saphira will ever find peace. You may run to the farthest corners of the earth, but unless you join the Empire, one day you will have to confront Galbatorix. I am sorry, Eragon, but that is the truth of it.
There’s just one problem with all of this, Brom… if Galby is so intent on hunting Eragon down, why hasn’t he, you know, gotten off his ass? Are the LOLGalbies true?
[Caption: A black cat hissing with text 'Fuck off Eragon / I'm sunbathing']
Seriously, the guy never seems to do anything. I think he realizes he’s in a shitty book and doesn’t want to do anything more than he’s contractually obligated to.
[Caption: Black cat looking out with text 'This book is shit / I refuse to participate']
I have fought many magicians, and several of the Forsworn, and so far, I have always defeated my opponents.” The lines on Brom’s forehead deepened. “Well, all but once, but that was because I was not yet fully grown.
Pfffahahahahaha! Excuse me for a moment, I have to laugh maniacally.
[Caption: Lelouch from Code Geass laughing]
I just… seriously! Look at that! “Oh, I got defeated once, but it was because I wasn’t grown up yet! It wasn’t at all because the other guy was better than me!” God, these characters are such fucking children.
Anyway, the reason I have always emerged triumphant is that I use my brain, unlike most.
[Caption: This is where we throw our heads back in laughter gif]
I am not a strong spellcaster, nor are you, compared with Galbatorix, but when it comes to a wizard’s duel, intelligence is even more important than strength. The way to defeat another magician is not by battering blindly against his mind. No! In order to ensure victory, you have to figure out how your enemy interprets information and reacts to the world. Then you will know his weaknesses, and there you strike. The trick isn’t inventing a spell no one else has ever thought of before; the trick is finding a spell your enemy has overlooked and using it against him. The trick isn’t plowing your way through the barriers in someone’s mind; the trick is slipping underneath or around the barriers. No one is omniscient, Eragon. Remember that. Galbatorix may have immense power, but he cannot anticipate every possibility. Whatever you do, you must remain nimble in your thinking.
*sighs*
*rubs temples*
All right. This is a big one.
Paolini is trying to set up the confrontation between Eragon and Galbatorix as a battle of wits, where the thing that will win the day is creativity and intelligence rather than strength. He honestly thinks that he is setting up a victory based on intellect and finesse rather than brute force. Unfortunately, he’s well on the way to invalidating this, and will go on to further cripple this point in the Green Brick.
Every single battle we see in these books has ended up relying on strength. The fight between Eragon and Durza? It may have been won because Durza got distracted, but he was distracted by Arya physically breaking something. The possible guile points are lost in a flurry of brute force. The fights with Murtagh? Keep being won by Murtagh and his powerup tokens, because Eragon runs out of mana faster. Hell,the existence of the powerup tokens alone is a point against this “intelligence is key” thing: if you need to fight the really powerful guy, you’re gonna need a bunch of plot tokens, as provided by a werecat’s hint about increasing your power, not your intelligence and creativity.
Paolini would tell us that Eragon wins the big standoff in the Green Brick because he figured out that Galbatorix overlooked non-verbal magic. That’s not what happened. What happened was that Paolini ripped off David Eddings and Eragon won via Deus Ex Machina and the help of the dragon-hearts in brute-forcing a non-verbal spell. And before that, all the moves that happened were obvious cliches. There was no battle of wits, only a battle of tropes.
All this stuff that Brom is saying? It’s interesting, it’s solid, and it’s something that really could lead to an original and satisfying conclusion to this series that has been so bogged down with unoriginality. But Paolini did not listen to his own advice. He thinks he did, but what he did was essentially the ultimate Tell, Not Show: he told us that the conflict was going to be a battle of wits, and then showed us a brute-force Deus Ex Machina.
You know who was listening, though? Me. And I intend to bring every sentence Brom says here to bear on Paolini’s precious characters, because Consequence is not dead and I am going to milk these books and this magic system for every loophole I can exploit, then figure out a way to have Vanora find them.
Eragon is going down, and he is going down to someone who followed the advice that he barely even paid lip service to listening to.
And now, back to our sporking! I can see the end of the tunnel, guys. Brom’s almost done talking.
Do not become so attached to any one belief that you cannot see past it to another possibility.
...like the possibility that Galbatorix is a human being rather than the flat caricature of a tyrannical evil overlord that you’ve been painting him as for three brick-sized books? Oh, wait, three-dimensional villains aren’t High Fantasy enough for this series. Carry on!
Galbatorix is mad and therefore unpredictable,
There it is! “He’s mad, therefore he’s evil and unpredictable and scaaaaaary!”
[Caption: Gif of man with wobbly arms and splattered with blood, standing over a man with a bloody hole in his belly.]
Fuck off, Brom. Just… fuck off.
but he also has gaps in his reasoning that an ordinary person would not. If you can find those, Eragon, then perhaps you and Saphira can defeat him.”
Again: this is all well and good for attempting to set up a battle of wits, Paolini, but if you wanted that to be the conclusion of your series, you fucking failed. You can’t have your enlightenment guile hero cake and eat it with your “epic” swordfights too.
Brom lowered his pipe, his face grave. “I hope you do. My greatest desire, Eragon, is that you and Saphira will live long and fruitful lives, free from fear of Galbatorix and the Empire. I wish that I could protect you from all of the dangers that threaten you, but alas, that is not within my ability. All I can do is give you my advice and teach you what I can now while I am still here… . My son. Whatever happens to you, know that I love you, and so did your mother. May the stars watch over you, Eragon Bromsson.”
And with that, Brom’s speech is done. The conclusion is kind of okay if you trim the “alas” bit and remove the extra dot from that ellipsis (yes, it does have four dots in the book), at least until you remember that “I hope you do” is referring to, you know, killing someone.
Yeah, not so warm and fuzzy now, is it?
I mean, I suppose I could get it if Galbatorix really was the Evil Overlord that Pao-Pao keeps telling us he is, but he hasn’t shown us any actual evidence of the man’s supposed evil. Everything we know about him points to him being lazy, depressed, or overwhelmed and just trying to be a good king, or some combination of those. We haven’t actually seen him going out and oppressing his subjects, or even signing an order to oppress said subjects. We have nothing to go on beyond the word of Eragon’s authority figures, and I think we can all agree that Eragon’s authority figures are uncommonly shitty.
The memory ends, and Eragon opens his eyes and has a bit of a cry, thinking, “Brom really was afraid that I would hate him”. Um… when did that ever come through in the memory?
I’ll tell you when: fucking nowhere. All Brom did was be pretentious, spout some “I love you”s, make false promises as to what the final battle was going to be all about, and fixate on killing a guy who the author really, really, really wants us to hate.
Saphira asks if Eragon’s okay, and he says he’ll be fine and that he’s proud that Brom is his father. Saphira makes a comment about how at least he got to spend time with him, because all she’s got of her parents are “some fuzzy memories from Glaedr”. That could have been interesting to explore, but in true Paolini fashion it will never be mentioned again.
Which basically just makes all of this pointless. Nothing has changed from the start of this chapter to the end. Eragon saw a memory, but he’s still thinking pretty much the same thing: “Okay, Brom’s my dad, yay! Thank fuck it wasn’t Morzan!” And that could pretty much be applied to the last chapter, too, because all that was was Oromis preempting everything Paolini thought the critics might say.
This chapter and the one before it could be excised or folded back into the one before them with no harm to the surrounding organism. So really, they’re kind of a metaphor for this book as a whole: bloated, unnecessary, and deserving of a place in the cutting room trash bin.
The next chapter is Souls of Stone, in which Eragon and Oromis have more unnecessary chatting about Eragon’s parents for a moment before switching gears to chat about Eldunarya. I’ll be back a few chapters later in The Tree of Life, in which Saphira pisses of a tree.
Until next time!
62 comments
[1]
theepistler
July 31 2018, 22:35:14 Edited: July 31 2018, 22:36:37
Whatever you do, protect those you care for.
Unfortunately, Eragon has so far failed to behave as if he particularly cares about anyone other than himself. I'm betting that if Roran or Arya died, he'd wangst about it for a paragraph or two and then forget all about it. I note that Garrow has barely even been mentioned in this book. The grieving process? What's that?
Wrapping his lips around the stem of his pipe, Brom drew on the smoldering cardus weed several times, blowing the chalk-white smoke off to one side.
Honestly? This description made me picture this guy right here:
[Caption: Picture of Popeye]
But without the badassery or the spinach
Also, the first book suddenly makes a LOT more sense now we know Brom was smoking weed the whole time.
..intelligence is even more important than strength.
Eragon never relies on "intelligence". Indeed, in the very next chapter he doesn't even seem to have remembered this bit of advice, as he immediately starts whining about how Murtagh is too "powerful", all but demanding a power-up token so he can beat the guy with, as you say, brute force. And when the Varden finally arrives on Galbatorix's doorstep, Durragon goes in with the most poorly thought-out plan possible, and absolutely no Plan B.
Honestly, I don't think Paolini knows how to write characters who rely on their wits. Whenever one of them has a problem he just takes it away for free, usually by introducing some random new ability or making chance fall in the character's favour, and then pretends this was actually the character being super smart/brave/resourceful. There's no such thing as an impossible situation in this setting. There's just temporary inconveniences.
[Caption: Daria Morgendorffer from Daria saying 'Maybe the next book you read should be, "When Mildly Inconvenient Things Happen to Shallow People."]
tt_7
July 31 2018, 23:53:02
Brom was smoking weed
WAZZZAAAAA!!!
[Caption: Gif of several people shouting 'Waaazzzuuuuppp' at each other across telephones]
[1A1]
syntinen_laulu
August 1 2018, 18:26:55
Also, just what did Paopao mean by 'cardus weed'? As far as I can tell there's no such plant as 'cardus', but carduus is Latin for 'thistle' and is the official name of a whole genus of thistles. Did he actually mean that Brom was smoking thistles?
[1A1A]
tt_7
August 1 2018, 22:58:26
I'm not sure if there are any thistles IRL that you can smoke which if any, Pao based them off, but perhaps he named them based on the thistles' appearance?
[1A1B]
torylltales
[1A1B1]
theepistler
[1A2]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 04:35:37
Unfortunately, Eragon has so far failed to behave as if he particularly cares about anyone other than himself.
Yeeeeeaaaaaah... this kind of shit is why we call the little fucker a sociopath, Paopao.
Honestly, I don't think Paolini knows how to write characters who rely on their wits.
I don't think he does either... because he himself never relies on his wits. He's never had to; everything's just... fallen into his goddamn lap. The guy needs to check his privilege, hard.
[1A2A]
torylltales
[1A2B]
theepistler
[1A3]
theepistler
August 1 2018, 15:03:52 Edited: August 1 2018, 15:06:27
Something else that bugs me in this chapter is the bit about how dragon riders can't rest while injustice roams the land, blah blah blah. You never see Eragon fight crime or stand up for the little guy, or anything like that. Ever. The only time he deals with a "criminal" is the whole Sloan thing, and that was about as far from justice as it gets, instead being a fine example of cruel and petty revenge. Indeed, petty revenge is basically the little shit's entire motivation, often for stuff that didn't personally affect him in any way shape or form but was related to him at second-hand by someone with an agenda.
That's not how "justice" works, Paolini. That's why in the real world, a criminal's fate is not decided by the families of the victim but by an impartial judge. Eragon is about as far from impartial as it gets, not to mention that he clearly knows jack-all about how the law works.
[1A3A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 15:19:34
This is... completely true. Paolini focuses so much on making Eragon an "epic" hero that he forgot to make him an actual hero: the kind of person who helps those in need. Fighting for the Varden is supposed to represent the fight for the little guy, but what we actually see is war crimes and Eragon having to be persuaded to heal a woman with cancer after going to hang with his buddies.
[1A3A1]
theepistler
[1A3A1A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 17:14:41 Edited: August 1 2018, 17:15:21
Yeah... Eragon pretty much never puts himself in danger for the sake of others. Paolini would say that he's fighting for the good of Alagaesia, but he really doesn't think about that kind of thing when he's in battle; instead, he gets all bloodthirsty and revels in his power like a madman. He has some moments in the first book, e.g. dragging Garrow into Carvahall despite having his legs torn to shit, but even then it falls flat because he never really ends up risking death, at least not consciously. Eragon only stands up for people a) who he (allegedly) cares about b) when he's certain he'll win.
As a point of contrast, look at the scene in The Incredibles where Violet and Dash make their little force-field hamster ball. Pause the video right before the field goes up and look at Violet's face, then hit play and listen to her lines. She had no idea that force field was going to work, and yet she jumped in front of Dash when she saw the goon aiming at him. She was fully willing to take those bullets for her little brother.
Eragon? He wouldn't have done that. Just look at the bit early in Inheritance where he runs through a castle looking for Roran, but hardly thinks about him on the way and then, when he finally finds him, is annoyed that he has to drop his sword to help his cousin, who he supposedly thinks of as a brother.
Heck, even the Eragon movie understood this better than Paolini appears to. The Saphira death fakeout was stupid, yes, but it did demonstrate that Eragon was willing to risk death by magic overuse to heal her.
[1A3A1A1]
theepistler
[2]
torylltales
July 21 2018, 23:36:37
What this [series] needs, above all, is some kind of emotion
Fixed that for you.
Paging the Department of Redundancy Department!
I regret to inform you that the Department of Redundancy Department has been made redundant. Any unpaid payments outstanding that need to be paid, can be paid by electronic email payment, or at your nearest ATM machine close to you. International visitors from overseas with a Visitors International Stay Admission VISA may contact our toll-free telephone number by calling the number listed under the heading 'toll free telephone number' in our Directory of Telephone Numbers directory. By calling the toll-free telephone number, you will not be charged a toll.
I wish that you and I could have this talk face to face, Eragon
Then WHY DID YOU SWEAR EVERYONE TO UNBREAKABLE OATHS OF SECRECY ABOUT IT?
Before my grave closes over me, though, I wanted to be able, at least this once, to call you my son… My son… Your whole life, Eragon, I have longed to reveal to you who I was.
Remind me again what the secrecy was all about? He's living under his own name in a village where nobody recognises him anyway, he may as well raise Eragon because who in Carvahall would give a damn? Only Garrow might know about his mother's evilness, but again, why would anybody give a damn?
I literally see no reason whatsoever for Brom to hide his relationship with Eragon for all of Eragon's life. Nobody who matters knows or cares about Eragon, nobody cares about Carvahall, and if Brom can "go into hiding" there without changing his name or his face or any recognisable part of him despite the regular (semi-regular? annual?) presence of Galby's soldiers in the village, then there shouldn't be any pressing reason to keep his relationship to Eragon a secret. Literally none.
What's going to happen? Some illiterate peasant from a tiny backwater farming village is going to march right up to Uru'baen and tell Galbatorix "A man named Brom is raising an infant boy named Eragon" and... then what?
How could Brom, in that situation, openly acknowledging Eragon as his son, POSSIBLY have any effect on anything?
when it comes to a wizard’s duel, intelligence is even more important than strength
We all know mage spells draw on INT for determining effectiveness, and not STR. This is not a new concept. It is, however, new to the IC, where magic directly and explicitly requires STR and (depending on Paolini's mood) even occasionally draws on HP.
[2A]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 03:06:41
We all know mage spells draw on INT for determining effectiveness, and not STR. This is not a new concept. It is, however, new to the IC, where magic directly and explicitly requires STR and (depending on Paolini's mood) even occasionally draws on HP.
????????????????????????????????
[2A1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 04:36:06
D&D joke. :P
[2A1A]
torylltales
[2A1A1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 10:59:07
I've written "Charisma-based" casters, but the way I tend to do it is having the character rely on force of personality to keep their magic in control. Unlike a wizard, who has to summon up power and focus it, a sorcerer-type has a shit-ton of power and has to maintain control over it so that it will do what they want. More "demon summoner who needs to convince the demon to help them instead of killing them" than "stage magician".
[2A1A1A]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 12:15:46
I for one like WIS as the skill of choice. It seems to me like the ideal stat for wrangling a bit of a primordial force, since WIS is the STR of intellectual traits.
[2A1A1A1]
snarkbotanya
snarkbotanya August 1 2018, 13:14:41 Edited: August 1 2018, 13:18:58
I always saw Wis as more the Con of mental stats, with Cha as the Str and Int as the Dex. Kind of a flawed analogy, though, since the mental stats are so different from the physical ones.
Personally, I really like using the Tomato Theory of Stats for this kind of thing:
- Strength is how hard and how far you can throw a tomato
- Dexterity is how accurate you are with a thrown tomato, and how well you dodge tomatoes
- Constitution is whether you can eat a rotten tomato without throwing up
- Intelligence is knowing that tomatoes are a fruit, specifically a berry
- Wisdom is knowing that even if tomatoes are technically fruit, they do not go in fruit salad
- Charisma is being able to sell someone a fruit salad with tomatoes in it
[2A1A1A1A]
torylltales
[2A1A1A1A1]
Anonymous
August 7 2018, 16:09:44
Luck-based magic does sound like it would be cool.
[2B]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 04:42:11 Edited: August 1 2018, 04:42:49
What's going to happen? Some illiterate peasant from a tiny backwater farming village is going to march right up to Uru'baen and tell Galbatorix "A man named Brom is raising an infant boy named Eragon" and... then what?
Then nothing... because, as we all know, this is how Galbatorix reacts when the Varden start stirring shit.
[Caption: Black cat napping on a high place with text 'Fuck that / it's naptime']
[Caption: The same cat sleeping on a couch with text 'Varden stole my eggs / Fuck it. Too comfy.]
[Caption: The same cat licking their snouth with text 'Terrorists? Fuck that / Gonna hang with the llllllladies]
We all know mage spells draw on INT for determining effectiveness, and not STR. This is not a new concept. It is, however, new to the IC, where magic directly and explicitly requires STR and (depending on Paolini's mood) even occasionally draws on HP.
Back in the 6th grade, I tried to make a custom Dragon Rider class for D&D 3.5. It used a system similar to power points, but based on Constitution. You could cast more, but it would be from HP.
[3]
tt_7
July 31 2018, 23:48:05
but he also has gaps in his reasoning
I'm expecting an exhilarating, edge-of-your-seat type of battle of intelligence here where it's not clear who's going to win and if anyone involved in the entanglement makes a slight mistake, it's all snoozing with the fishies for them, like the Sherlock vs Moriarty cat and mouse game. But turns out that you still rely on magical prowess to win apparently. *disappointed grunt*
Do not become so attached to any one belief that you cannot see past it to another possibility
[Caption: Gif of man lifting his sunglasses and putting them back again.]
Pao's characters are finally self-aware!!! Ironically, I think it's good advice which CP needs to take note of instead of dismissing us critics as "just them HaTuRz" and stroking that smug egotistic attitude with his deluded perception that he's the next Tolkien
Brom lowered his pipe, his face grave
This whole paragraph could be a touching, poignant exchange between father and son before a large-scaled war that would possibly claim both their lives, making this the last conversation between father and son. Too bad when you read behind the lines (as per how Anya mentioned) it starts to take an uncomfortable turn...and altogether jarring when the Eragon was scared bit came.
It's actually sadder when you think that the author couldn't be bothered to keep the memory thing constant, and instead adds in stuff as he goes.
some fuzzy memories from Glaedr
Reminds me of the book City of Dragons, where the dragons rely on the memories of their ancestors to guide them to survive, and this is an interesting to carry out. Too bad Pao's too reliant on his "homage" sources to figure out something original for the series.
[3A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 04:48:14 Edited: August 1 2018, 04:48:26
Ironically, I think it's good advice which CP needs to take note of
This is a common thing with shitty writers: they don't actually think about what they're writing, so they end up with the impression that they've written something far better than they did. Stephenie Meyer genuinely thinks her books are feminist, and Christopher Paolini genuinely thinks he wrote an epic tale on par with The Lord of the Rings which culminated in a stunning battle of wits.
I suspect that these authors can't read beyond the surface of any works, really. Why else would they be so unable to spot the implications of their own?
[4]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 02:53:08
I feel like this “reveal” falls flat because we haven’t seen Brom act all that fatherly towards Eragon. From what I remember of Eragon Brom was quite rough towards Eragon, showing little love for his son outside of the required Sue praise (which doesn’t count). And when Eragon talks to Brom about names for Saphira, he acts as if this is his first time talking to Brom. You’d think that Brom would try to talk with and engage with his son, even if he can’t let Eragon know that he’s the father.
[4A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 04:49:17
This is true, and raises a couple of questions... namely, did Paolini do that because he doesn't know how to write a character being fatherly, or did he write it like that because that's how his father treated him?
[4A1]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 04:58:39
I’d say it’s a combination of both, but I don’t know enough about Ken Paolini to say so.
— The anon you replied to
[4A1A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 05:08:56
K-Pao's behavior towards members of this comm certainly point to a less-than-fatherly type of person.
[4A1A]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 07:43:34
Considering Roran is semi-based on ol' Kenny Pao, I'd say that's a fair assessment.
[4A1B]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 07:44:45
While that’s true, it may have stemmed from parental over-protectiveness. Even if Ken Paolini’s aggressiveness was based on greed, it doesn’t mean that he’s distant from his son. (It just means that he’s an asshole).
—The same anon
[4A1B1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 11:00:43
That is fair. Still... he seems like the kind of helicopter parent who's emotionally distant from their child even as they shelter the crap out of 'em.
[4A1B1A]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 12:14:41
Different guy from the one above, but I sometimes think this community over-estimates the extent to which Paolini projects his family life into his work. Mainly because I think that takes a kind of skill that he lacks—if he were really gonna base something on his dad, it’d be the same broad panegyric as for his sister-insert, at least in this conjecture by an anonymous asshole.
[4A1B1A1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 12:24:02
That's fair enough, but I'd like to point out that I'm not claiming that he's doing this intentionally. In fact, if he is basing his characters (other than Angela) on people in his life, I'm pretty certain he's not doing it intentionally. Writers of Paolini's ilk tend to be prone to accidentally airing their issues in their writing. I'm not sure exactly why, but my guess is that it's because they aren't especially creative and have a hard time imagining their experiences as anything but universal, or at least more universal than they actually are.
[4A1B1A1A]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 18:07:36
That’s also fair enough! I’d like you to know I wasn’t trying to take a shot at you, just noting an observation of a line of questioning I didn’t find as convincing as other ones.
I suppose I was coming from a place of writing-as-communication, in that plenty of authors channel their personal experiences and the people they’ve met into their works. F. Scott Fitzgerald, for instance, translated both his experiences with Zelda and his alcoholism into The Great Gatsby. The line I’m going to draw is that in this case, Fitzgerald knew both how he felt and how to communicate it. There is sincerity and self-awareness in his writing, both traits Paolini seems to have trouble exhibiting. Perhaps it’s that his life story isn’t that interesting.
Who else of his ilk have you observed this trait in? It’s an interesting topic now we’re on it!
[4A1B1A1A1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 18:38:33
Stephenie Meyer. It's particularly apparent in Breaking Dawn, where a whole lot of the ridiculous bullshit surrounding one Renesmee Carlie Cullen feels like Meyer is airing all her dissatisfaction with how pregnancy and motherhood actually work, and with the sons she got instead of the daughter she wanted. The result is extremely uncomfortable.
[5]
thegharialguy
August 1 2018, 03:21:06 Edited: August 1 2018, 03:42:51
"The second is that the lichen on the trees is described as “chartreuse”. Oddly enough, this isn’t completely inaccurate; some lichens are pretty damn colorful. However, using the word “chartreuse” to describe it is anachronistic and clashes with the setting. The color chartreuse was named after a French liqueur introduced in the 1700’s. Most of Alaglag appears to be stuck in the dark ages, or the High Medieval era at the latest, and there is no France. They should not be describing things as “chartreuse”."
In my eyes the fact that Chartreuse was only created after the middle ages or is French inspired isn't a problem. All of our words on Earth come from some form of Earth like origin and it's reasonable that everything should be viewed through a lens of translation. That is to say, a words meaning is more important than the word itself. If they actually spoke accurate medieval English it would basically be incomprehensible. Like, I don't see any problem using the word lime to describe something even if the setting wouldn't theoretically have the fruit (or hey, even orange for a more obvious example...although I'm not sure if the colour named the fruit or vice versa in that case).
Now that's not to say chartreuse is actually a good word to use. It's a terrible word to use because its just plain esoteric. Unless one is discussing wine or paint, it's not a word that needs to be shoved in. Green and yellow work fine as is.
Saphira asks if Eragon’s okay, and he says he’ll be fine and that he’s proud that Brom is his father. Saphira makes a comment about how at least he got to spend time with him, because all she’s got of her parents are “some fuzzy memories from Glaedr”. That could have been interesting to explore, but in true Paolini fashion it will never be mentioned again.
Apparently the perfect recall pensieve ability of dragons is unique to Saphira.
[5A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 04:52:15
I'm not arguing for them to be speaking medieval English, but they should definitely leave out words like chartreuse. Also, the "lime" bit is a little subjective; I might be able to accept it in narration, but if a character said it, I would probably take issue.
Apparently the perfect recall pensieve ability of dragons is unique to Saphira.
Of course it is. It's not a dragon ability, it's a plot convenience ability.
[5B]
torylltales
August 1 2018, 06:40:18
The other thing about using 'chartreuse' is that Paolini famously bragged in interviews about how he did all sorts of painstaking research to avoid using specifically modern terms (his example was backpedalling, from bicycles) that didn't belong in the era/culture. 'Chartreuse' is a clear violation of that boast.
[5B1]
theepistler
August 1 2018, 09:41:09
In a supreme piece of irony, he used "backpedal" in Eragon anyway.
[5C]
Anonymous
August 1 2018, 07:45:37
The fruit named the color.
[5D]
syntinen_laulu
August 1 2018, 18:19:56
I disagree. Chartreuse is a lousy word to use because it's a live metaphor which quite specifically references France, and monasteries, and the concept of after-dinner / cocktail-type bitter liqueurs in general. I can't recall if anybody in Alaglaglag drinks hard (i.e. distilled) liquor. There's no special reason why they shouldn't have (it did come into use in late medieval Europe - for the very rich - for occasional ordinary drinking as opposed to medicinal use), but I just can't see them sitting around mixing cocktails or having digestifs.
Orange is a different case altogether. Yes, it is the name of a south Asian fruit: but it has been used as an standard colour word in English - in fact the only word we have for that specific colour - for half a millennium, and using it doesn't normally even make the reader think of actual citrus fruit, let alone jerk them out of a medieval-style AU.
I would expect Eragon to say something like “yes, I need an explanation now” or “no, I need to process things first”; something that indicates that his mind is indeed still trying to grasp what’s happening now.
'Need an explanation', yes. 'Need to process things', no. Process in the sense 'register or interpret information / data' was first used in the mid-20th century in computing, and only began to be used as a metaphor for mental and psychological activity in the 70s or thereabouts. That's still a live metaphor, and would certainly grate on me. He could say he needed to 'digest' the revelation; that's an ancient metaphor.
[5D1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 18:33:15
I can't recall if anybody in Alaglaglag drinks hard (i.e. distilled) liquor.
I don't remember any mention of anything other than wine and beer... there might be mead at some point, but in the grand tradition of shitty fantasy authors I'm pretty sure Paolini just uses "mead" as a fancy word for "beer".
'Need an explanation', yes. 'Need to process things', no. Process in the sense 'register or interpret information / data' was first used in the mid-20th century in computing, and only began to be used as a metaphor for mental and psychological activity in the 70s or thereabouts. That's still a live metaphor, and would certainly grate on me. He could say he needed to 'digest' the revelation; that's an ancient metaphor.
I think you're missing the point a little here. When I wrote that, I wasn't suggesting that those lines be used verbatim, just saying that I'd buy something to either effect (hence the words "something like") rather than the shit we got.
[5D1A]
syntinen_laulu
August 1 2018, 20:03:58
in the grand tradition of shitty fantasy authors I'm pretty sure Paolini just uses "mead" as a fancy word for "beer".
Me too. Hardly anybody writing fantasy stops to think what mead is made of and thus how expensive it was, back when honey was the only sweetener in Europe, and so valuable that your average beekeeper could no more afford to eat it than a Caspian fisherman could dine off caviare. Poets wrote about kings and heroes drinking mead in the same breath that they told of those kings handing out gold arm-rings to the heroes: that was royal luxury and glamour.
I wasn't suggesting that those lines be used verbatim
Sorry! Over-literally-minded me.
[5D1A1]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 20:51:45
Hardly anybody writing fantasy stops to think what mead is made of and thus how expensive it was,
Hell, hardly anybody writing fantasy knows what mead is. I'm pretty sure a good portion of them actually think it's just a fancy name for beer.
[5D1A1A]
theepistler
[5D1A1A1]
snarkbotanya
August 2 2018, 18:05:42
Hey, I said "hardly anyone", not "nobody".
Being a complete teetotaler (due to the fact that the taste of alcohol registers in my brain as "Sharpie smell and death"), I only have a vague idea of what mead is, but I do know enough to know that it's not the same thing as beer. And if I wanted to include mead in a story, I would research it first to make sure it made sense.
[5D1A1A1A]
theepistler
[5D1A1A1A1]
thegharialguy
August 2 2018, 23:46:46
That goes against my basic assumption of it, which was that it's something heavier than beer.
[5D1A1A1A1A]
theepistler
[5D1A1A1A1A1]
thegharialguy
August 3 2018, 11:23:24
That sounds like something worth trying.
[5D1A1A1A1A1A]
theepistler
[5D2]
Anonymous
August 2 2018, 09:21:18
In my opinion, the problem is not that term is an anachronism -except very blatant cases, you can afford that stuff in a fictional world-, is that Paopao used a word very little people (at least in the original version of the book, not sure in others) will know what it means.
Purple prose?. Very likely.
[5D3]
thegharialguy
August 2 2018, 13:11:31
See I don't really have a problem with processed either. It might only be a term that's come to exist since computers appeared, but it's still a word that refers to a very specific concept, and even though we had no reason to articulate the word before computers were around, the concept still existed. I agree to a certain extent with what someone above said, that characters saying words out loud like this is a bit more egregious, but over all I have no real problem with such anachronisms.
[6]
cmdrnemo
August 1 2018, 08:14:39
This book constantly reminds me of Wormhole X-treme!
Anyone have a name for that thing, the one where a writer comes up with an overly complex solution that makes no sense. Then works backwards to try make that solution look more logical. All the while failing completely? Like 'we need to fake a zero g environment so the air force colonel can float over the alien,' 'why doesn't he just shoot the alien,' 'because that's not what's in the script,' 'yes, but hold on, are you saying someone in the military can just shoot an alien? And that'll work? We don't need a zero-g set?' Only then the writer makes the aliens bullet proof in an attempt to justify the zero-g solution. And the audience is all "that wouldn't work, gravity doesn't selectively apply only to the alien. It could just jump. And if its bullet proof then it has no reason not to jump. So the explanation designed to justify why whatever is happening makes sense, actually makes everything make less sense.
Anyways. That's how Paolini tells a story. He comes up with something that might be cool, it'd be hard work to make it cool, doable though. Only he doesn't handle it well, then his justification completely fails. Maybe a voodoo shark thing.
Why are all these sharks chasing me?
Voodoo curse.
What? Those work? Who do I know that does voodoo? Why sharks? How is that answer more confusing that if you'd just said 'no reason at all'
Angry shark.
[6A]
snarkbotanya
August 1 2018, 11:03:00
It's kind of close to what How NOT to Write a Novel terms "The Manchurian Parallax of the Thetan Conspiracy Enigma (in which backstory overwhelms story)". I'd say it's a variant where instead of there being too much backstory because the author just likes backstory too much, there's too much backstory because the author stubbornly refused to change from a stupid idea and thus put in a shitload of "justification" for it.
[7]
syntinen_laulu
August 1 2018, 20:59:02
To be fair to Paolini, the trope of the hero who doesn't know who his father is/was, while the people around him including his wise old mentor who could tell him don't, for flimsy reasons or none at all, is so widespread that he might be forgiven for using it. To take only his obvious
And while Harry Potter does know who his father is from the outset, JKR has Dumbledore hold on to all kinds of important information about James Potter and his relationships, long after Harry is not only old enough to deal with it but badly needs to know it, with only the flimsiest of excuses. And while some people may well have called her on it, most readers just seem to accept it. It's almost as though people feel you're just Not a Proper Hero if people give you the information you need at the time it would have been logical for them to give it you.
[7A]
princesselwen
August 2 2018, 10:54:16
On Star Wars: I always thought the reason Luke didn't get told that Vader was his father was because Obi-Wan and Yoda were setting him up to kill Vader because they thought he was irredeemable. So they actually had a very good reason, from their point of view, not to tell him, and Vader threw a wrench in their plans by doing so.
And hey, Dumbledore at least admitted that his lack of communication with Harry had not been a good thing. Even if it was annoying as heck to read because it sent Harry sixty million points up on the angst-o-meter.
[7A1]
thegharialguy
August 2 2018, 13:07:09 Edited: August 2 2018, 13:08:03
This is completely true. On the spectrum of not "Not telling people what they need to know," Harry Potter and especially Star Wars have some sort of justification, while Inheritance has basically zero.
Also, does Luke aunt and uncle even know Vader is Luke's father? Or hell do they even know Vader is a person?
[8]
Anonymous
August 2 2018, 09:30:38
In an interview Paolini said that his motivation for writing the books was that he wanted to write the story he would have liked to read as a child. He also wanted to fix the things he thought were wrong in the stories he grew up with.
The plot of Eragon and Eldest mimics the plot of Star Wars very closely.
Thus, it could very well be that Luke being the son of evil Darth Vader instead of good Obi Wan Kenobi was one of the things Paolini disliked and 'fixed' in his story. Another 'fix' was making Arya, the Leia equivalent, an elven princess unrelated to Eragon: Luke lost his love interest when he discovered that Leia was his sister, but Eragon gets to keep his.
Anon - 4.
.
[9]
theepistler
August 12 2018, 14:16:00
Rather hilariously, this exact same thing happens in the last BattleAxe book - Azhure gets a letter from her long-lost dead Mumsy, and it's horribly overwritten. What I wrote while sporking that bears repeating here:
"...this is not how you express yourself when writing a heartfelt message to a child you loved but were forced to abandon by the Plot-O-Matic™. This is how you express yourself when you’re trying to show off how fucking clever and erudite you think you are. (But really aren't)."
Seriously, Brom should just talk to Durragon like a fucking human being. Instead he decides to wax lyrical just because he can, apparently, and it makes him look like a pretentious prick. (Even allowing for the fact that everyone in this book talks like a pretentious prick).